Beowulf ond Godsylla (Beowulf and Godzilla)

"Meanehwæl, baccat meaddehæle, monstær lurccen;
Fulle few too many drincce, hie luccen for fyht.
Ðen Hreorfneorhtðhwr, son of Hrwærowþheororthwl,
Æsccen æwful jeork to steop outsyd. Þhud! Bashe! Crasch! Beoom! Ðe bigge gye
Eallum his bon brak, byt his nose offe;
Wicced Godsylla wæld on his asse.
Monstær moppe fleor wyþ eallum men in hælle.
Beowulf in bacceroome fonecall bamaccen wæs;
Hearen sond of ruccus sæd, "Hwæt ðe helle?"
Graben sheold strang ond swich-blæd scharp
Stond feorth to fyht ðe grimlic foe. "Me," Godsylla sæd, "mac ðe minsemete."
Heoro cwyc geten heold wiþ fæmed half-nelson
Ond flyng him lic frisbe bac to fen
Beowulf belly up to meaddehæle bar,
Sæd, "Ne foe beaten mie færsom cung-fu."
Eorderen cocca-cohla yce-coeld, ðe reol þyng."

"Meanwhile, back at the mead-hall, a monster lurked;
Full few too many drinks, he looking for fight.
Then Hreorfneorhtðhwr, son of Hrwærowþheororthwl,
Asked the awful jerk to step outside. Thud! Bash!Crash! Boom! The big guy
All of his bones broke, bit his nose off;
Wicked Godzilla wailed on his ass.
Monster mopped the floor with all the men in the hall.
Beowulf in his back room phonecall be making was;
Hearing sound of ruckus said "What the hell?"
Grabbing shield strong and switch-blade sharp
Stood forth to fight the grimlic? foe. "Me" Godzilla said, "Make the mincemeat."
Hero quickly getting hold with famed half-nelson
And flying him like frisbee back to forth.
Beowulf belly up to the mead-hall bar,
Said "No foe beaten my fearsome kung-fu."
He ordered coca-cola ice cold, the real thing."